Draft:
While whaling is a big part of Japanese culture, they kill around 1,000 whales a year. Japan shouldn't allow whaling in their country because whales will become extinct. In time if whaling continues, whales will become extinct and this can affect the food chain. It will also increase global warming. Whaling is uncalled for and unnecessary.
The extinction of whales would be a tragedy because many cultures venerate whales. Whale stories are recited all around the world. Whale's mean a lot to people and their cultures. Whale's are also the largest mammals on this planet, for them to become extinct would be a horrible reflection on humanity. Japan's research program kills around 1,000 whales a year, they say for research. But the excess whale meat is being turned into dog food and served in Japanese restaurants.
The decrease of whale population will affect the food chain. Many other animals will be affected by the extinction of whales, including humans. Does Japan want to be responsible for whales and many other animals to become extinct?
Global warming also affects the decrease of whale population. Ensuring healthy whale populations is critical to restoring the health of the world's oceans. If the Japanese continue whaling then whales will soon become extinct, causing global warming to increase. The International Fund for Animal Welfare (IAW) is opposed to all forms of commercial whaling because they say its cruel, unnecessary because it meets no pressing human need, and poses threat to the survival of the world's remaining whales. Does Japan want to contribute to global warming, and the extinction of whales?
Japan asks if whaling is really any different than us killing cows for hamburger meat. Well cows are not close to becoming extinct. Cows let out a gas called methane, which increases global warming. So by humans eating cows, we are helping to reduce global warming. Cows are also over populated, so we are helping to reduce the population. Whaling is reducing the population to the point of extinction.
Whaling is uncalled for and unnecessary because the whales will soon become extinct, the people who venerate whales and recite whale stories will no longer have pictures of whales, the food chain will be affected , and global warming will increase. Japan should stop whaling in their country!
Revision plan:
1. fix intro sentences
2. Fix repetition
3. Get more evidence
4. Fix arguments
Whaling
By Illianna Gonzalez-Soto
Whaling is a big part of Japanese culture; they kill around one thousand whales a year. Whaling trips affect and increase global warming while hunting whales for research and human and animal consumption. In time, the increasing loss of the whale population will result in extinction.
The extinction of whales would be a tragedy because many cultures venerate whales. Whale stories are recited all around the world. If whales become extinct than all whales will be are stories. Many people won’t be able to imagine whales and all whales will be is a piece of paper with a picture on it, or words coming from a person’s mouth. Whales mean a lot to people and people want to go see them. If whales become extinct then no one will be able to see them live ever again.
Many other animals will be affected by the extinction of whales. One of these would be krill. Krill are some of the fish that whales eat. If the whale population lowers, then the krill population will increase, and eventually become too big. We do not want the food chain to be thrown off!!
Whaling also affects global warming. All the chemicals coming from the ships that are used for whaling is traveling up into space and making the o-zone layer get bigger! The trips are unnecessary and they contribute to global warming. Japan shouldn't’t allow whaling in their country!
Japan asks if whaling is any different than us killing cows for hamburger meat. Japan’s research program kills around 1,000 whales a year, for research. But the excess whale meat produced during “research” is being turned into dog food, and served in Japanese restaurants. Whales weren’t made for eating or for being fed to dogs, but cows were made for feeding everyone. So yes killing cows is different than killing whales. Cows are made for human consumption, but whales aren’t.
If whaling continues than whales will soon become extinct, people who venerate whales will only have words to remember whales by, the food chain will be affected, and global warming will increase. For all these reasons, Japan should put an end to whaling in their country. Whales are the largest mammal on Earth, and they were made for studying. For whales to become extinct would be a horrible reflection on all of humanity not just the Japanese.
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Japan's continued and expanded program of scientific whaling is inconsistent with its obligations under the Law of the Sea Convention, the International
Convention for the Regulation of Whaling Convention, the Convention on the Conservation of Antarctic Marine Living Resources (CCAMLR), and the Convention on Biological Diversity to protect and preserve the marine environment, to protect rare and fragile ecosystems and endangered species, to prepare environmental impact assessments when changes to the marine
environment are likely to be caused by its activities, and to refrain from claiming resources under the guise of marine scientific research. This
program is not legitimately "scientific" because it has not been peer-reviewed and does not have precise quantifiable goals. It is inconsistent with Japan's obligations under the Convention on Biological
Diversity because reduces the sustainability of whale species and has "adverse impacts on biological diversity." It is unquestionably an abuse of
right because it invokes Article VIII of the Whaling Convention in a manner that certainly was unanticipated by the framers of the Convention and has
been repeatedly condemned by the majority of the other contracting parties to the Convention.
Japan's actions can be challenged by concerned states in the International Court of Justice or through the dispute resolution procedures of the Law of
the Sea Convention and the conciliation procedures of the Convention on Biological
Diversity.
Plus a few other irregularies- which all measn that they are very dishonourable people.
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